Lessons from a Killdeer

She did it again. The mama killdeer put her nest smack dab in the middle of our side yard. What in the world? Aren't birds supposed to build nests up high out of harm's way? Does she not know that the ground is dangerous? That this is the place  where lawnmowers ride and neighborhood boys play football? Obviously not.

The killdeer is a strange bird. Being a Kentucky girl, I was not familiar with them until a year ago when we moved into the Raleigh area, and I began seeing this beautiful bird in our yard. Then, when she built her nest and laid four eggs right in the middle of the "football field," I had to go online to figure out what kind of crazy bird this is. According to the "internet truth of all truths" site known as "Wikipedia," the killdeer "gets their name from their frequently heard call. They frequently use a distraction display, otherwise known as the 'broken wing act' to distract predators from their nests. This involves the bird walking away from its nesting area holding its wing in a position that simulates an injury and then flapping around on the ground emitting a distress call. The predators then think they have easy prey and are attracted to this seemingly injured bird and away from the nest. If the parent sees that a potential predator is not following them, they will move closer and get louder until they get the attention of the predator. This is repeated until the predator is far from the nest, and the killdeer suddenly 'heals' and flies away." So, of course, I had to test this out. I have to say it was as if the bird had read the manual. She did exactly this as I got closer to her nest!

So, maybe this isn't a crazy bird after all. Maybe she's right where she's supposed to be-smack dab in the middle of my yard. Smack dab in the midst of danger. Just doing what she was created to do. Building her nest and living how her Creator created her to live.

 Psalm 91 came to mind as I've been thinking about this.
"Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty. This I declare about the Lord: He alone is my Refuge, my place of safety; He is my God, and I trust Him. For He will rescue you from every trap and protect you from deadly disease. He will cover you with His feathers. He will shelter you with His wings. His faithful promises are your armor and protection. Do not be afraid of the terrors of the night, nor the arrow that flies in the day. Do not dread the disease that stalks in darkness, nor the disaster that strikes at midday."

I don't know about you, but I struggle with passages like this. I'm sure it comes as a surprise to you, but God doesn't always  do what I want or rescue me or those I'm praying for from bad things. Why is one person's life healed or spared and another not? Why does my specific prayer get answered sometimes and not other times? Why does it look like evil wins? Don't we all wonder these things? I was reading through this Psalm with that in mind, and something caught my eye. Notice that it does not say that nothing bad will happen to us. If He promises rescue, there's obviously things we need rescued from. If He promises covering, there's things we are vulnerable to. If He promises shelter, I must be in situations where I need provision. None of us are exempt from sickness, disease, difficulties, or tragedies. I'm like the toddler who is forever asking, "But why?" rather than trusting that my Heavenly Father knows more than I, and "because I said so" sometimes is the answer I get because He knows things that I'm not old enough to understand yet. And sometimes I'll not be old enough until eternity....

And still I'm safe here? The Psalmist does not claim we are "safe" because we are spared of these. He says we are safe because under the wings of our God, we always have hope. Hope that God cares for us in these times. Hope that God is sovereign over all our circumstances-the ones we see and the ones we don't. (I'm reminded of how many times I'm thankful He saw things I did not!) Hope in a Father Who is perfect. Hope that He loves us with a faithful love unlike anyone else. Hope that we are never alone. Hope that He is truly enough for our every need, even if we still doubt that. Hope that He CAN and often DOES give us earthly healing and deliverance. Hope that there is also certain glorious deliverance beyond what we can visibly see. Yes, our circumstances can absolutely bring the emotions of doubts and fears. We wouldn't be human if they didn't. And I'm not saying we can't ask for earthly deliverance and rescue. We can and should! Let me just be completely vulnerable here and say this. I have allowed fear to be such an idol in my life. Parenting is only one facet of this. It's manifested in several other areas as well that have kept me from fulfilling my calling. Sometimes, I just want God to do what I want or a quick deliverance more than I want HIM cause after all, it's all about me, not Him. I want more of what God can give me than God Himself. And by doing this, I basically am questioning  His love, as if He had not already proven it for me sufficiently through the cross. Ouch. I'm even afraid of posting this, but maybe somebody else out there feels like they can identify, too?
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The comforting truth here? God knows we're prone to this. And so He gives us these gracious reminders to read of Who He truly is. In the midst of our trials, we can grow to know Him more and not have to allow fear to overcome us. The promise here is that in the midst of our fear, we can find shelter, rest, refuge, peace, and even confidence and a growing faith. Remember also that in Christ, no final evil will overcome us. We already have that promised. Some days I need to be reminded of that! In the midst of my own nest of children, some who have left, some leaving the nest and some still here, there are dangers that every mama fears in every season. And I like to build my nest up high in the tree where it's safe. But God says put it right down here and trust Me. Even when danger is all around, He reminds me that He equipped me to live this life, as a parent, but also as His child,even when it doesn't always make sense. I mean, after all, what mama walks away from her nest in order to protect them? Crazy, huh? What about you? Where do you try to build your nest? I don't know your season of life, whether it is filled with sleepless nights of newborns, busy days of toddlers, temperamental kids or teens, or figuring out your role now that your child is an adult. Maybe it's not children at all, but a complicated work situation, a horrible sickness, or other trial in life. What circumstances in your life test your faith in the God Who claims in this Psalm to be all of this to you and more? Do you find yourself living in faith or completely paralyzed by your fears?

God has a promise for us who will trust Him. We have His presence. He covers us with His great big wings. As a parent, I can't remove situations from my children, but you can bet I'm going to wrap my arms around them, love them, and walk with  them through the trial. Isn't that comforting for a child? How much greater is our God. While I'm still in the trenches of parenting, God's also revealed many other areas where I've allowed fear to keep me from living this life fully for Him. Parenting is not my only task in life, but it has sure taught me so much about my Father. I'm venturing into so many new seasons of serving the Lord, and it's exciting! I don't want fear to overcome the excitement of fulfilling His purpose for me. What about you? His promises sustain us day by day, hour by hour,and moment by moment. No baby bird stays in the nest forever. She was created to fly. We were, too. Let's stop allowing fear to be our idol and trust Him to live out the life He's called us to live.  Trust the One Whose arms are wide and Whose love is great. Who oversees every detail of your life and guards what you cannot. Whether the deliverance is now or later, the deliverance is promised, but even better is the One Who is with us. In light of eternity, it's a win-win. Do not dread and do not be afraid. He Who has promised is surely faithful.

Lord, help us not to fear, but to trust You more and live this life worthy of the calling we have received. I want to finish well!